Saturday, October 16, 2010

Wetlands by Charlotte Roche .

The first sentence of this novel begins...

As far back as I can remember, I've had hemorrhoids.

...and on page 12 Charlotte writes...

Just don't wash too much. For one thing because of the all-important flora of the pussy. But also because of the taste and scent of the pussy, which is so important during sex. Don't want to get rid of that. I've experimented with long periods of not washing my pussy. My aim is to get it's enticing scent to waft lightly out of my pants, even through thick jeans or ski pants. Men won't consciously notice it but it'll register subliminally since we're all just animals who want to mate - preferably with someone who smells like pussy.

...and on page 14 Charlotte writes...

I use my smegma the way others use their vials of perfume. I dip my finger into my pussy and dab a little slime behind my earlobes. It works wonders from the moment you greet someone with a kiss on each cheek.

...Wetlands has caused a lot of controversy. It has 229 pages and was written in 2008 in German. It was translated into English by Tim Mohr in 2009. Being interested in books that cause a stir, I bought a copy. You meet Helen Memel, an 18 year old admitted to hospital following an intimate shaving accident. Wetlands is very light reading. It is a little, short story book but is very funny and is like a stand-up comedian. Wetlands is a good book and I will vote it 4 stars on Book Army . It is written in the first person, it is very entertaining and an easy read. Wetlands tackles views on personal hygiene, fashion and sex. It gives the reader a refreshing thought of a lively young woman who is fresh, youthful, exciting, ready and able to challenge convention. She demonstrates a joy for living and she is very comfortable in her own body. I enjoyed reading this novel, it is adult in it's content, rather graphic, quite erotic, it is not offensive but quite good fun. There is a sub-plot going on where Helen tries to lengthen her hospital stay in the hope that she can get her divorced parents to get back together. The structure and pace of this story is good. The whole time frame of this novel is set within Helen's hospital stay, yet this story does not feel claustrophobic. There is a good ending where you feel great sympathy for Helen as she is discharged from hospital.

Wetlands is not so much a novel in the conventional sense, it is more like a one-off stand-up comedy routine. It is well put together though. It is a nicely told tale that makes men wonder about the secrets of women as they walk past. Is she spotlessly clean or feral but sexy?
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